Why Don't You Want To Hold Your Baby?

Last night I watched a young mother swinging her baby in an infant carrier. Back and forth, back and forth, the woman's arm extended unnaturally far from her body in order to allow the carrier to swing freely without bludgeoning her legs. "He likes to be moving all the time," she volunteered. "I have to keep him swinging or he fusses."

Having watched the pair for almost 15 minutes I found the toll on the woman obvious, as she stopped frequently to stretch her back and chest and switch the precious load from one hand to the other, so I thought she might be open to another way. Yes, a better way, in my opinion.

"Have you tried holding him yourself?" She looked at me blankly. "Have you tried holding him in your arms instead of the carrier? He might be happier closer to your chest."

No, she didn't think so. And besides (she explained), she can just snap the carrier back into the car seat rather than unbuckle and buckle the baby to hold him. "Really, the carrier is so convenient," she gushed.

"More convenient than your own arms", I asked, playing along as if convenience really were the measure of a good idea. Apparently she decided that walking briskly in the opposite direction was what her baby needed right then, and as I watched her walk away I just felt sad.

Sad for all the babies who spend more time in a cushioned hunk of molded plastic than in their mother's arms. Sad for all the mothers who are simply doing what they see other mothers doing. How can they not want to hold their babies as close as they can whenever they can? How can they not want to brush their chins on their babies' downy heads... flutter their lashes on those ultra-soft cheeks... and simply breathe together?

I don't get it at all.

Personal thoughts aside, the medical community weighs in: Excerpted from St. Luke's website and other pediatric forums.

Are there problems associated with overuse of infant equipment?

• It's ok to use infant equipment. Infant equipment can be fun for your baby and useful for parents.

• However, infants develop in response to their experiences and their environment. Recent research showed that infants who spent lots of time in equipment were actually slower to meet their developmental milestones than babies who spent less time in equipment.

• The shape of a baby's head can change in response to pressure from the back of the car seat, bouncer seat or swing. A study of infants who spent a total time of more than four hours a day in their car seat/carrier, bouncer or swing found they developed flat spots on the back or sides of their skulls that changed their head shape. Positional plagiocephaly is the medical term used to describe this asymmetrical head shape.

• Researchers found that babies whose parents reported using infant equipment for a total of one hour a day or less had fewer of these problems.

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting
Motherhood